


It's raining cats and buckets

by turntechGeneticist717



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Dirty Talk, Domestic Fluff, Established Relationship, Fluff, Foreplay, Kinda, M/M, Sexting, human/troll AU, no actual smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-13
Updated: 2017-12-13
Packaged: 2019-02-14 05:27:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,967
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13000812
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/turntechGeneticist717/pseuds/turntechGeneticist717
Summary: Dave finds a kitten and brings it home for Karkat





	It's raining cats and buckets

**Author's Note:**

> Just a small, silly, cathartic one shot of Dave bringing a kitten home for Karkat. It's been close to two years since I lost my cat and I've been sad af lately so the kitten in this fic is based on her. I'll include a link to some photos of her at the end if anyone wants to see what see looked like

You’re walking home from your latest DJing gig and it’s fucking pouring down rain. Not to mention that it’s freezing balls out too. You should probably hail a taxi but eh, it’s not too far to your apartment. Shits still coming down hard enough to fill buckets though, which you’ll have to remember to mention to Karkat for the sole purpose of bringing up filling your own buckets together. *Insert eyebrow waggle here.* You can already picture the indignant look on his face, the blush that will spread prettily across his cheeks, the insults he’ll defintely hurl at you for being a ‘vulgar fuck’ and the smile that he’ll no doubt try to hide. Fuck, your boyfriend is adorable.

Boyfriend. Heh. You and Karkat have been together close to three years now and your heart still fucking flutters like a school girl whenever you think of him. You’re still not entirely sure how you landed a hottie like Karkat. I mean yeah, you’re a Strider and obviously smooth as fuck, not to mention a fine piece of ass but Karkat is like a solid fucking 10. He’s like a 10 x infinity plus one type of hot. God tier fucking hot. No one can touch his hotness. Except you of course, cuz he’s your boyfriend. Heh. Speaking of your extra hot boyfriend, you decide to pull out your phone to text him and let him know that you’ll be home soon and maybe mention those buckets.

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering  carcinoGeneticist [CG]

TG: babe

TG: yo babe

TG: hope youre ready for this d cuz I’m almost home

TG: and by d i mean this dick

TG: just in case you thought i meant some other kind of d

TG: like my name or maybe donuts or donkey kong or something

TG: donkey kong and donuts do sound pretty sweet though

TG: but well have to save those for another night

TG: maybe our anniversary since donkey kong is like our initials and shit

TG: but the only sweet sweet d you’re getting tonight is mine

TG: dude

TG: you better not be sleeping

TG: youre really going to regret it in the morning if you miss out on some grade a strider lovin

CG: THE ONLY THING I’M REGRETING IS PAST KARKAT CHOOSING THE SINGLE MOST OBNOXIOUS NOOK LICKER IN EXISTENCE AS THE MAN HE WANTS TO SPEND THE REST OF HIS LIFE WITH. AND JUST FOR THE RECORD, WE ARE *NOT* SPENDING OUR ANNIVERSARY EATING DONUTS AND PLAYING DONKEY KONG.

TG: oh we so are dude gotta have the three deeees for our third anniversary

TG: one guess what the third d will be

TG: *hint* youre getting it tonight too

CG: I’M NOT GETTING SHIT FROM YOU TONIGHT IF YOU HONESTLY THINK THAT’S HOW WERE GOING TO CELEBRATE THREE BULGE CHAFING YEARS TOGETHER. I’M FUCKING SERIOUS DAVE.

TG: me too babe

CG: THAT’S IT, I’M CHANGING THE FUCKING LOCKS ON THE DOOR. YOULL HAVE TO FIND SOMEONE ELSE TO PUT UP WITH YOUR UNIQUE FORM OF BULLSHIT.

TG: aw babe you know i still have the key to your heart and other places though wink wink and dude youll be so blissed out on our anniversary from the thorough dicking I give you that you wont even care what we do the rest of the day

TG: gonna give that nook and bulge the attention they deserve

TG: and speaking of maybe it was my superior skills at being a ‘nook licker’ that impressed past karkat

TG: made him think that he better lock this fine specimen of human perfection down cuz he’d never find someone who worships that nook better than me

CG: HHMM MAYBE, BUT I THINK I FORGOT HOW GOOD YOU ARE AT IT, MAYBE YOU SHOULD GET YOUR ASS HOME AND REMIND ME.

TG: whoa really

TG: I mean shit yes dude

TG: you better be on the bed ready and waiting for me

TG: im going to make you purr all night long yo

CG: DAVE! JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP AND HURRY HOME, OKAY?

CG: I’LL BE WAITING FOR YOU (;B

TG: oh shit it’s the cute winky nubs face

TG: were really gonna get freaky tonight huh

CG: DAVE! HOME, GOD DAMMIT.

TG: right right ill be there soon

CG: <3

TG: <3

 

turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering  carcinoGeneticist [CG]

 

You slip your phone back into your pocket with a smile on your face. Karkat likes to put up a front but he can never resist your charms. You don’t even notice the cold or the rain anymore, there’s much steamier things filling your mind now.

You had stopped under a store front awning when Karkat had mentioned spending the rest of his life with you, your attention focused fully on messaging him after that. He lets sweet little things like that slip sometimes. Things that remind you that yes, Karkat, the most amazing fucking dude you’ve ever met, really does love you and enjoy being with you. It never ceases to send a warm feeling spreading through your heart and, like most things with Karkat, you know it’s something you’ll never tire of.

You step out from under the awning, intending to hurry the hell home and into your boyfriend’s awaiting, and most importantly, horny arms. You stop short when a small movement in a nearby alley catches your eye. You tense up instantly, still a reflex even after all these years you’ve been free from your Bro. You cautiously approach the spot where the movement came from. You know you won’t be able to relax for at least a week if you don’t assure yourself that there’s no threat.

As you come closer you see a cardboard box slightly shift and you think that may be the same movement that originally caught your eye. You brace yourself as you take a few more steps and peek around the box. It takes you a moment to spot the small ball of drenched fur that’s huddling itself against the box as tightly as possible, probably trying to get out of the torrent of rain that’s still pouring down.

You think that it’s a rat at first but then you notice it’s pretty markings and realize it’s a very small, very cold and very wet, calico kitten. Shit. You reach down to pick it up and it cowers away from you.

“Shhhh. It’s okay kitty. Shhhhhh,” you say to it as soothingly as possible and it seems to work because the kitten lets you scoop it up on your next attempt. Fuck yes, no one can rest your dulcet tones.

You open up your jacket some and cradle it against your chest to protect it from the rain as you look around the alley to make sure it’s the only one. It is. It’s completely soaked and shivering nonstop. You try to brush some of the water from its fur as you speak comfortingly to it and it starts to purr against you. Even you, in all of your manly masculiness, has to admit that shit is pretty fucking cute. Like seriously, aw.

It lifts it’s head just a little and blinks up at you. It’s an adorable, scrawny mass of black, white and orange fur but what really wins your heart is the tiny little slash of black fur it has right above one of it’s eyes. It looks like a tiny, permanent angry eyebrow. It’s a little Karkat cat. Shit. Looks like you and Karkat’s little family is about to grow to 3.

You leave the alley and find another awning to stand beneath and pull out your phone.

 

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering  arsenicCatnip [AC]

 

TG: yo nep

TG: you awake

AC: :33< hi dave! yes im awake, whats up?

TG: do you still work at that emergency vet clinic

AC: :33< yes! im working there right now actually

TG: sweet

TG: i found an abandoned kitten in the rain can I bring it by to get checked out

AC: :33< paawww! of course! are you coming right now?

TG: yup ill be there in like 15 minutes

AC: :33< pawesome! I’ll get a room ready for your kitty!

TG: thanks nep see you soon

 

turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering  arsenicCatnip [AC]

 

You decide to get a cab so you can get the kitten out of the rain that much sooner. Luckily it doesn’t take long to find an available one since the cab drivers hang around this time of night to take people home from the club. Once you and the kitten are situated and on your way to the vet, you pull out your phone and text Karkat again. You’re purposefully vague because you want to surprise him once you and kitty get home.

 

turntechGodhead [TG] began pestering  carcinoGeneticist [CG]

 

TG: hey babe

TG: slight change in plans

TG: ill be home in like an hour maybe two

CG: OH.

CG: IS EVERYTHING OKAY?

TG: yup everything’s good

CG: OH.. OKAY.. I’LL SEE YOU THEN I GUESS.

TG: later babe

 

turntechGodhead [TG] ceased pestering  carcinoGeneticist [CG]

You close out of your messages and slip your phone back into your pocket. You can tell Karkat is disappointed but he was expecting you to sex him up so who can blame him. He’ll understand as soon as he gets a look at your new little kitty though. He’s going to be so fucking stoked. He loses his shit anytime he sees a cat on TV let alone in real life. Fuck, maybe you should have brought home a kitty before this. Your thoughts are interrupted as the cab pulls up to the vet clinic. Nep is outside waiting with an umbrella and you pay the cabbie and follow her inside, thoughts of Karkat momentarily forgotten.

\---

You’re in the elevator going up to your and Karkat’s apartment. The vet ended up taking about two hours but the little kitty got a clean bill of health. She ( as Nepeta informed you most calicos are) is currently cuddled up in the cardboard carrier that Nep gave you. When you get to your floor, you pick up the carrier and the bag of kitten supplies that Nep hooked you up with and head to your apartment.

You open the door quietly in case Karkat is sleeping and set the kitty carrier and supplies by the couch and remove your coat and shoes. Then you go off to search for Karkat. He’s unsurprisingly in your shared bedroom and still awake. He sits up in bed as soon as he notices you and he looks so fucking happy to see you that it makes your heart clench up.

“It’s about time, you fucking bulge fondler. Now get over here and make good on your promise,” he greets you with.

“Sorry Karkitty. I found a new kitty to make purr tonight,” you joke back at him.

Karkat’s face completely falls and he hunches in on himself. He looks away from you and his hands clench at the sheets.

“Oh. Yeah. I mean I guess it had to happen eventually. Who..who is it?” he asks you and oh fuck. You forget how sensitive and self-conscious Karkat can be sometimes and you realize he thinks you meant another person.

You don’t even waste time giving him an answer and instead walk straight to him and just press him down against the mattress, your body flush with his and kiss him with every ounce of emotion and wanting you can muster. He only hesitates a moment before responding back just as passionately and your hips involuntarily grind against his. He snakes a hand into your hair and his other claws lightly against your back. You use the hand you’re not bracing yourself with to grip his thigh and pull his leg up to wrap around you. He groans into your mouth and arches against you. You adjust your arm so that you can support your weight with your elbow and forearm, freeing up your other hand so that you can use it to wind into his hair and rub at the base of his horn just the way you know he likes. As soon as you do, Karkat begins to purr and it jolts you back into awareness that there’s still a poor little kitty locked in a tiny carrier in the living room. Shit.

You regretfully break the kiss and pull away from him. He whimpers in disappointment and stares breathlessly up at you. You cup his face and give him one more quick kiss before you speak to him.

“Babe, there’s literally *no one* I could ever want more than I want you. I fucking love you,” you tell him openly and honestly. Moments of passion are one of the rare times you allow yourself to be so vulnerable and Karkat’s the same way.

“Then what the fuck were you talking about and why the shit were you two hours late?” he demands. You press your forehead against his and smile against his lips before you remove yourself from the bed and pull him up with you.

“Come on,” you tell him. “I brought you home a surprise.” He gives you a doubtful look but follows you when you start towards the living room. You decide to make him close his eyes and you lead him to the couch and have him sit down. You get the carrier and open up the top. The kitten is curled up asleep and you mentally chastise yourself because you could have finished your sexy time with Karkat had you known. Oh well, you’ll make up for it later. You pick up the kitten and press her to your chest and go and sit down next to Karkat. You set her in your lap and still sleepy, she just stretches out and looks up toward Karkat.

“Alright babe, open your eyes.”

Karkat’s eyes pop open and, with his mouth agape, he stares at the kitten and then at you and then back at the kitten. He has yet to say anything so you decide to help him along.

“Babe, you better close your mouth before I start thinking of all the dirty things I can do to it.”

“Dave, ugh. Must you always ruin the fucking moment?” he says but hey, you got him talking at least.

“You know I can’t help myself,” you respond and he smiles at you and reaches a hand out to pet the kitten. She sniffs at him and then tilts her head to press into his hand and starts purring.

“So this is what you meant by someone else to make purr?” he asks and you nod at him. “Where did you get a meow beast at 2 in the morning?”

You launch into the story, not leaving out any details. Including the vet trip and the fact that the kitten is a female. Karkat listens intently and keeps petting the kitten as you talk. She eventually gets up and moves to his lap and the look of pure joy on his face makes your heart feel like its going to explode.

“So.. is she.. ours?” he cautiously questions when you’re done speaking.

“Of course dude. Well, I mean as long as you’re okay with that?”

“Fuck yes. Oh my god Dave, she’s so fucking cute,” he says and leans over to give you a kiss. “Look at her little angry eyebrow!”

“I know, she looks just like you,” you tell him and receive a glare in response.

“What are we going to name her?”

“I’m not sure but it has to be something epic.”

“No. Absolutely fucking not. You are not giving this precious baby a stupid as fuck, ironic name. I swear to god I will really change the locks on you this time.”

“Dude, chill out. It has to be a name we both agree on and we’re not picking some lame as fuck romcom name either,” you say even though you know you’ll give into any name he really likes.

“Hhhmmm,” he replies, knowing just as well as you that he’ll win this game. “Maybe we should get to know her a day or two before we name her.

“Yea, I like that idea.”

He smiles at you again and the two of you lapse into comfortable silence and just enjoy petting and playing with the kitten for a while. After a bit, you get the bag of cat supplies that Nepeta gave you and you and Karkat work together on getting her litterbox and food and water dishes set up. When that’s all finished your trio retreats to the bedroom to finally get some sleep. You lay on your back and Karkat curls against your side, his head resting in the crook of your arm and one of his legs thrown over your yours. You trace your fingers up and down his side and he brings a hand up to absentmindedly stroke your hair. The kitten is still a little wound up and you and Karkat laugh quietly together as she bounces around the bed, attacking both of your feet. She finally settles down and comes to lay on your chest, her back pressed up against Karkat’s arm. She falls asleep purring, now warm and content, such a contrast to how you found her earlier.

“Sorry babe,” you say, “looks like the kitten is the only one who gets to purr tonight.”

“That’s okay,” he says looking up at you with a smile. “You’ll just have to make up it up to me on our Triple D Anniversary.”

You laugh and pull him tighter against your side and kiss the top of his head. You fall asleep not long after, warm, content and the happiest you’ve ever been.

**Author's Note:**

> here's that link to the pics of my kitty-
> 
>   
>  <https://nuwanda717.tumblr.com/post/168494140405/photos-of-my-baby-kitty-rip-for-a-one-shot-i>   
> 
> 
> Thanks for Reading!


End file.
